The first time you hurt someone and like it –
The first time you steal and cheat and win –
The first time you love someone and hide it –
Can time alone corrupt you from within?
The hundredth time you wallow in your vices –
The hundredth time your bottle numbs the pain –
The hundredth time you see what hate entices –
Will all your struggles forever be in vain?
The only time you ever lose your god –
The only time your worldview falls apart –
The only time you face a firing squad –
Are some things dead before they ever start?
The last time your hands ran through her curls –
The last time you touched her freckled skin –
The last time you cared about this world –
Are all those moments lost – have never been?
(Munich, November & December 2018)